I have always been passionate about love. I’m Colombian, Italian and Brazilian so that explains a lot of it! At some point, however, everything became about love for me. Even on Utopia they labeled me #DrLove. Everything I do is with the intention to inspire more love in this world.
As humans our purest essence is love. Babies only know how to love. Everything else is learned. We are on this planet to love. What else is the purpose of life? The foundation and motivation for all things stems from love–to express love, find love, and be loved. It’s all about love.
Let’s love some more! Sometimes we don’t even realize we are limiting love in our lives and hence why I decided to write this post. I am guilty of limiting love in my life in all of these ways at some point or another. But because of my commitment to personal growth and because I am a love ambassador I share these ways to love some more.
7 Ways to Stop Limiting Love in Your Life:
1. Be Open. Be Vulnerable.
Being open means to be vulnerable. Being vulnerable means sharing our whole self with another. It means sharing the dark corners of our hearts. It means sharing our fears and our dreams. Being vulnerable is about volunteering information, emotions, and feelings with another person. It’s about admitting when we need reassurance and validation.
Studies show that vulnerability is the key to fostering intimate relationships and connections regardless if it is romantic, friendship, or even a deep, open-hearted conversation with someone new.
2. Acceptance. Accept others exactly as they are without the need to change them.
Acceptance is about unconditional love–loving another and ourselves no matter what. This is compassion. The moment we try to change anyone we’ve stepped out of love. No one is perfect, just perfectly imperfect. We can choose to love all the beautiful bits and all the flaws (which are beautiful bits too) no matter what. We can choose to love others through their process. As well as love them from a far if the relationship is not serving.
When others feel our unconditional love and vice versa, the feeling is expansive, amazing, and blissful. Our hearts open and we can’t help but love some more.
3. Let Love be Freeing. Stop possessing others or allowing yourself to be possessed.
You are a person not a possession. Love is meant to be freeing. It is meant to highlight all of the beauty within us. We shine when we feel love. It is natural and normal to meet new people and connect. This is another reason we are here on this planet–to connect with other human beings and to love them.
Entering into any friendship or partnership that limits our expression of love for ourselves or for another person is not rooted in love, but rather possession. If we truly love another person we want them to be happy, to shine and to connect with the other beautiful souls. And we except the same in return. Let go, and trust in love.
4. Celebrate Others. There is No Competition.
What we do to others we do to ourselves. There is enough beauty, love, and abundance to go around. Celebrating others is the greatest way to bring more love into our loves. It feels good to celebrate another. They feel loved. And what better way to feel love than to give love and watch as that person light up because of you!
Competition is only a reality if we choose it to be. We are each unique beings, each one of us is special, so realize there is something to celebrate about each and every person.
5. Express Your Love
The simple act of expressing love goes a long way! Just say it–“I love you!” Watch how those words can be healing and heart opening. Love is something we can feel easily and often–if we allow ourselves to.
Some people are scared to say it for fear they will scare the other person away. Who cares! Say it! Or show it.
There are different love languages–touch, quality time, words, acts of kindness, and gifts. Which are yours? Communicate them with those you love so that you can feel assured they are receiving your love and that you are receiving theirs.
6. Experience Love in The Now
In whatever form or package it presents, experience love as it appears in life. Whether it be for a season, a lesson or a lifetime. Saying no to love because it doesn’t check off all the boxes, or because someone is of another religion, or because they dress differently than we do, or because our partner doesn’t want us to is no way to live.
Love can be as pure and innocent or as deep and intimate as we choose it to be. Turning away any bit of love is missing a beautiful opportunity. Just because a person may not appear to be the package of a life partner or a best friend, it doesn’t mean that they don’t have valuable things to share or teach us.
If the heart is guided to love and connect in the moment no matter what the mind says and no matter the circumstances, choose to experience love in the now for it will expire when it is meant to.
7. Be Present
Nothing shows your love more than being present in the moment with whoever you are with. Quality of time is more important than any quantity of time. Despite our busy schedules, we can make time for priorities. We make time for the people we love and what better way to show them our love than to be present–putting the phone away, clearing the mind, and giving them our undivided attention for a meal or for an hour. They can feel if we are present with them or not. Being fully present means the world to the people we love.
Which of these hits home for you the most? Which are you guilty of committing recently? Which of these have happened to you recently? In what ways can you stop limiting love in your life right now?
For me, #2 and #3. I am guilty of not abiding by #2, and the opposite of #3 recently happened to me.
Mr. Z recently came into my life. I noticed he wasn’t as open and vulnerable with me as I wanted him to be. When I asked him to be more open he told me, “That’s not how I operate.” So, I made a conscious choice to not spend as much time with him. Yet, there are so many wonderful things about our friendship that I now realize I limited love in my life. Choosing to accept him exactly as he is instead of trying to change him is how I could have invited more love into my life. And now I will send him a nice message letting him know how much I appreciate him and the synergies our friendship has co-created.
As for #3, throughout my life, many male friends have been told by their new girlfriends that they can’t be friends with me anymore. This is interesting because if we had a romantic connection, we would have decided to enter into a partnership before they even met. Of course I respect their decisions, but it makes me sad when love and connection are limited in any way.
I recently became friends with a Mr. X, who also happens to be married, and his wife wasn’t comfortable with it. It is very clear that love/connection and sex are not the same thing. We meet new people of the opposite sex all the time, and there are bound to be beautiful connections to be explored. To limit heart connections and love in any way simply because we are in relationships or marriages only stifles our human experience and limits inspiration from flowing into our lives.
But of course, to not limit love in my life, I accept and respect the wishes of others. I choose to continue to keep my heart open and appreciate whatever love crosses my path, while support others in whatever way they most feel comfortable expressing love. These situations are always good lessons for me in acceptance and compassion so I’m grateful for them.
Thank you for being vulnerable with me. I look forward to reading your comments and thoughts. Wishing you a more love-filled day.