Step 3 to Freedom: Change & Transformation

Beautiful music played in the background as we walked in silence around the Hall of Metals.  This hall is decorated with stain glass windows of portraits of individuals from Damanhur community. Each face representing a period of time in life. 


We were instructed to stand before each face and reflect back, or forward, in time and think about the people who were, or will be, the most important to us during these times in our lives. 


Relationships ignite healing and transformation. 


It was a beautiful, uplifting experience to think fondly of family and friends of the past and future. As an elder, I imagined my grandchildren and community would be most significant. 


When I stood in front of the face of a teenage girl, representing age 14-21, he immediately came to my mind. I began to cry. They were nostalgic, loving tears. 


During this time of my life I was in a 9 year relationship. Through high school and college he was my best friend, my love. He became family. We had planned to get married, live in suburbia with a house and kids happily ever after. We really loved each other. 


He was perfect for that time in my life, but as time would reveal, not forever. The love never died, but I changed. What I wanted changed. So I had to set him free. 

Change is the only constant in life. 

Our family, friends, beloved, colleague, etc. are our teachers and barometers for our transformation. Sometimes we grow together, other times apart. As we change, so do the people in our lives. The perfect people appear at the perfect time.



We finished the experience in the Hall of Metals by pairing up for silent eye gazing. Having spent 6 weeks together, it was like seeing each other for the first time–in a new light. We had never been so intimate with one another. This created a shift in our group. 


We were all mirrors for each other, sparking change, growth and lessons for one another. Spending so much time together it was normal for us to trigger each other, revealing the parts of ourselves that need more love–the parts of ourselves ready to be transformed.


I’m a talker. I grew up in a home where we were encouraged to share our feelings so it’s really easy for me to share my process. I know this isn’t the case for everyone, so for the past few years I have been doing my best to talk less and listen more. 


During the New Life Program, when one woman talked over the person giving the lesson to share her insights and knowledge studied from other schools, before letting the guide finish, I observed myself feeling triggered. This was the perfect reminder for me to be mindful about how much time I spend sharing within the group, being sure to create space for others to share too. 


Just because I easily and happily share my experiences, others may need a bit more silence before they share their hearts. With consistent action to mindfully choose to listen over speak, I create change that benefits the community–allowing others the space to share too. 


When we combine Step 1 of Action with Step 2 of Continuity, something will result in our lives that was not there before. Either we will transform or our environment will. 


As we take action everyday in creating our lives, change and transformation is inevitable. 


Change and transformation is quest 3.


The quests are not only about personal transformation, but also the community. The purpose of relationships is to trigger each other, reminding us to be the change we wish to see.


If we don’t flow with change we can feel frustrated or stuck in life. 


Being willing to change our minds can enhance our lives too. When we change our point of view we can experience a whole new reality. A shift in perception can pull us out of states of depression or stagnation.


Seeing the world through a difference lens can expand our innovative and creative abilities. 


When we continually act and become comfortable with and committed to change, our lives begin to transform with grace. As do we.


To create a life we love, we must be willing to transform and welcome in change. Both internally and externally. In mind, body and spirit. This is also an important step to spiritual freedom (aka enlightenment) and living our dreams